I think it's routine at this point to want to 'fix' myself and be better, take steps towards a Better me, and then successfully fail that task. Then I will lounge about in my gloom, come across the need to fix myself once more, and rinse and repeat.

Whenever I set about on my desire to become something more than what I already am (which comes with the asian-parent-package.exe), I expect failure as an outcome. Sure, I'll feel the high that comes with committing to a habit for >n+1 day(s) but it wears off eventually, giving way to mind-consuming helplessness.

So here I am, writing this post. My intentions are to be held... accountable. I've never really done that before. Well, I have. But it's easy to escape being held accountable if your accountability buddies are online and are escapable if you refuse to log onto your communication media of choice. I'd like to try again, anyway. I'm changing my expectations this time around, though. Instead of wanting to Fix myself, I think I want to know who I am. Like meeting someone for the first time and slowly getting to know them over a course of few months. I've realized that I don't treat myself very well, so I want to try my hand at befriending Me.

Only time (and my posts) will tell how this attempt of mine spans out. The nice thing is that I can try again and again; I can't be lonely if I'm there with myself, haha.